The Roots, or What Started It?

By Ami Dayan

My professional background is in the theatre, so storytelling has always been at the heart of my work. Some of my plays are interview-based, so I am also familiar with the profound impact of sharing life stories. And yet, when I learned about the work of renowned Harvard-trained geriatrician, Dr. William H. Thomas at his Greenhouse Project—I was as surprised as I was inspired. 

Dr. Thomas is founder of The Eden Alternative—a philosophy and program that de-institutionalized nursing homes worldwide over the past 20 years—and of the Green House Project, an innovative, nationally recognized model in long-term care. The model creates small homes that recognize the individuality of residents and honors their autonomy, choice, privacy and dignity. 

Attending a lecture by Dr. Thomas back in ’02, I learned that in the Green House Project nursing homes, before a caregiver can provide care to a care recipient, the two have an orientation session during which they tell each other their life stories. 

I still recall my jaw dropping upon hearing this. So simple, almost elementary, and yet so radical, forward thinking and insightful.  

I was aware of the power of one way interviews; where a caregiver inquires, and a care recipient shares personal history that the two can return to, but Dr. Thomas’s insistence on mutuality deeply impressed me. No doubt, this more intimate approach is an opportunity to build familiarity, confidence and  trust between the caregiver and care recipient. 

Thirteen years later, a New York Times article by Mandy Len Carton titled “To Fall in Love With Anyone, Do This” introduced me to the work of social psychology researcher Arthur Aron, who developed “The 36 Questions that Lead to Love,” a guided mutual interview protocol which helped boost intimacy between thousands of strangers, resulting in friendship, romance, even marriage. Again, my jaw dropped. Dr. Aron’s work focuses on sparking romantic responses between strangers, and it does so brilliantly. It also convinced me that curated reciprocal interviews can bring people closer – period, help find common humanity and reduce hostilities across enemy lines, bridge racial divides and generational gaps, make the workplace more friendly;  and certainly draw friends, family and  loved ones ever closer. 

So it was with these two inspirations in mind that The Interview Game began to take form, and it’s been growing ever since.  Making it easy and fun for people to share life stories is a powerful way to foster trust, build relationships, and deepen connections for life. Who could ask for anything more?